Who Will Be DC Comics' First Gay Superhero? Our Top Six Picks

Categories: Whatever

People everywhere with not much going on in their lives are all atwitter over the news that a DC Comics superhero is coming out of the supercloset in June. That's right: Someone who wears skin-tight clothing and very likely a cape will reveal to a stunned world that they are, in fact, gay. But who will it be? DC Comics is playing coy, so right now all anyone can do is speculate. Here are our top six candidates. (Illustrations by Monica Fuentes)

6. Aquaman
Aqueerman.jpg
As you can see from this picture, DC has been dropping hints all along; here, the friend of fish (and apparently of Dorothy) is proudly signing the "Y" from the Village People's "YMCA." The A-man has perhaps been unjustly brushed off by the general public, who tend to think he just breast-strokes around, talking to sea anemones and vaguely "defending" the oceans. However, Aquaman can survive on land for long periods, and he's also stronger on land, as he's used to all the resistance from water. Maybe recasting Aquaman as Aqueerman is also a shrewd way of giving props to a superhero who's powerful but who just needs a little more hydration than the average Joe.


5. Green Lantern
green_lantern.jpg

This is straight from DC Comics' bio: "Imagine if the ring on your finger was more than a piece of gaudy jewelry. Instead, it's the universe's most powerful weapon." Oh, really? A ring, you say? Perhaps the ring is more than the source of Green Lantern's power, but is a wedding ring he wears as a show of defiance to California's Prop 8, and of a sign of love and commitment to a husband who might not be a superhero but who's still special in his own way.


4. Wonder Woman
supwoman.jpg
Maybe DC's spokeswoman was throwing reporters a curveball when she said that a major superhero will announce that "he" is gay. Maybe it will turn out to be golden lasso-twirling, raven-haired beauty Double-W. Many people may not realize that Wonder Woman's back story involved her being the princess of an island inhabited by Amazons, which is pretty much like being a power forward in the WNBA. Wonder Woman has it all -- strength, cunning, a fabulous tiara -- and pervy dudes everywhere would surely love a story arc involving a Wonder Woman-Batwoman-Supergirl love triangle.

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16 comments
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miss_msry
miss_msry

Don't you mean "openly gay"?

MadMac
MadMac

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Spadeofaces91
Spadeofaces91

I don't think it'll be superman. I still think him and Lois go at it

David Houston
David Houston

I'm not so sure, just how many times can you survive being drilled by the man of steel?

Blake
Blake

Making fun of the name Robin just three days after the passing of Bee Gee Robin Gibb? Malisow, I am shocked.

MadMac
MadMac

I thought DC already did this bit, last year with Wonder Woman. Then I also thought they did this bit a couple years ago with Huntress.

Sihaya
Sihaya

And Batwoman.

MadMac
MadMac

What'd you call my Momma?

Dudley "Booger" Dawson
Dudley "Booger" Dawson

Why the hell is Flash Gordon on here?  Jesus tap dancing Christ!

Sihaya
Sihaya

Flash Gordon is in the comics not DC.

Sihaya
Sihaya

Lemme look it up...

Dynamite comics prints the current run, which started last year.  Dark Horse began reprinting the many different archived versions a couple of years ago.

Smedley
Smedley

That's what I was thinking... Starting to wonder it I perhaps was missing a subtle joke.

Craig Malisow
Craig Malisow

Good gravy! Thanks for pointing that out. We'll fix it ASAP! 

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