New Horsefly Species Named for Beyonce: 5 Better Names It Should Have Gotten

Categories: Whatever

beyoncefly.jpg
There's bootylicious gold in them thar hills.
The Washington Post reported that an Australian researcher had discovered a new species of horsefly and, because its backside was gold and therefore "bootylicious," he was naming it after Houston's own Beyoncé.

The species will henceforth be known as Scaptia (Plinthina) beyonceae.

Nice, but we're not sure it's a compliment to have a fly named after you, especially if, as the Post writes, it's possible "the rare species is a bloodsucker like many female horse flies."

So let's suggest five other options.

5. Goldenass
If it's not the name of a James Bond parody porn film, it should be.

goldamyrear.jpg
You can't honor a prime minister?
4. Scaptia (Plinthina) backthatazzup
Come on, Goldy, you know you want it.

3.GoldaMyRear
What, former Israeli prime minster Golda Meir shouldn't be honored? We're sure she had a very nice tuchus back in the day.

2. The Metamorphoses of Lucius Apuleius
Cut, paste and Google it, fools.

1. Scaptia (Plinthina) sirmixalot
"I like gold butts and you other brothers can't deny..." Come on, he needs the pub a hell of a lot more than Beyoncé.


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4 comments
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Gaspar_Ramsey
Gaspar_Ramsey

I've read "The Golden Ass," as it's commonly named. And no, it's not about Mitt Romney.

harry whodeeney
harry whodeeney

australians are hilarious, was the scientist named bruce?

LearnYourself
LearnYourself

"I like gold butts and you other brothers can't deny..." I would appreciate it if you didn't do that again.It's "I like gold butts and I can not lie, you other brothers can't deny..."Now stop.

Jim C
Jim C

Damn, having a fly named after you is pretty fly!

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