Jeremy Myhres: Genius Turns Simple Beer Wahoo Mission into Felony

Categories: Crime

jeremymyhres.jpg
Jeremy Myhres
According to Nacogdoches cops, 25-year-old Jeremy Myhres walked into an area Chevron Monday night, picked up an unspecified quantity of bottled beer and attempted to leave without paying.

When the clerk gave chase to the gold-grilled brew-heister, Myhres turned and hurled one of the bottles at the clerk, striking him in the arm and causing him an injury that required an emergency room trip. Myhres thus made good his escape, but not for long, as police soon found him at a nearby apartment complex, no doubt a couple of brews into what he had hoped would be a free drunk.

Had Myhres gotten caught after simply running away, he likely would simply have been cited for misdemeanor theft. However, chunking that brew at the clerk kicked things up a notch. Not only was he out a cold one, but now he's facing a felony charge of robbery, one that could net him two to 20 in the pen.

Per his Facebook page, Myhres is a native of Biloxi, Mississippi, and a recent Houston transplant. What he was doing in Nac is a mystery.

Not so mysterious? His philosophy on life, revealed in full on his thug life Facebook page.

He sums up his worldview thusly: "im a real ass nigga when it come to my kids , they my life."

This he also believes: "this a real nigga that has bounced back all the way fuck with me and thats real talk . get yo stacks up and get on the gride."

He also apparently claims affiliation to the Simon City Royals, a 40-year-old Chicago-born street gang with a predominantly white membership and a stronghold on the Mississippi Gulf Coast.

Myhres has been in trouble a lot lately. On his Facebook wall he discusses a trip to prison that started this past June. Also, the Gangsta Deliverance banjo mugshot herein comes from Marion County, Florida, where Myhres was arrested in February and charged with domestic violence.

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9 comments
Jim C
Jim C

You can kinda tell by looking when someone's parents were related to each other before they got married, can't you?

Hugh Ramsey
Hugh Ramsey

hey dummy, "im a real ass nigga when it come to my kids , they my life." is a song lyric

errrr

ribalding
ribalding

Stop it before it breeds again.

(Seriously, if this guy has a library card, I will personally donate $1000 to the republican presidential nominee of his choosing.)

Mike
Mike

I thought it was The Osmands

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