Thursday NFL Free Agent Update: Is Wade Phillips Still Missing?

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What's more glamorous, dude: New York or Houston?
As I type this, it's 4:36 p.m. on Thursday and the Texans' free agency activity still can be summed up as follows:

1. Backup offensive tackle Rashad Butler
2. Backup wide receiver Jacoby Jones
3. Backup Matt Leinart

No cornerbacks, no safeties, no nothing on defense. Clearly, franchise savior defensive coordinator Wade Phillips is still under duress somewhere and needs our help. Before you read on, I would ask that you listen to our prayer for Wade from my show today, join in, and let's hope the power of prayer brings back Doctor Wade.

Also, please let it bring us Nnamdi Asomugha. Amen.

Okay, some quick observations on the last 48 hours:

1. Speaking of Nnamdi Asomugha, it appears to be down to the Texans and the Jets for the services of the former Oakland Raider cornerback. The Texans appear to have more money (including no state income tax, a big deal when competing with the oppressive tax of the tri-state area), the Jets appear to have more glitz (and a better team). Jets corner Darrelle Revis says he wants Asomugha in a Jets uniform:

"He's the best cornerback in the league," said Revis, who often has been labeled as such by others around the league. "Me and him as a tandem would be unbelievable. It would be awesome."

In the absence of Wade Phillips, allow me to address Nnamdi directly. Nnamdi, don't believe Revis. Back on July 16, in ESPN: The Magazine, he said "I'm the best defender in all of sports." See? He's a liar. One week, he says he's the best, the next week he's telling you what you want to hear. He's playing you right now like you're some drunk chick at the bar. Don't fall for it.

Brian Cushing would never do you like this, Nnamdi. Come here for the next five years and find out for yourself. Please?

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The Jedi master

2. The quarterback carousel spins around. Matt Hasselbeck to the Titans. Donovan McNabb to the Vikings. And finally today, the worst-kept secret -- Kevin Kolb traded to the Arizona Cardinals for Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie and a second round pick -- was revealed. (For the record, the loose lips on this deal came from whoever runs the merch portion of the Eagles website when they actually put Rodgers' jersey on sale yesterday afternoon. Good to know that the guys selling jerseys on the team website know about deals before insiders do. Adam Schefter just had his gig endangered by some slappy in front of a laptop.)

I think of all the deals done for quarterbacks so far, the Kolb trade has the biggest chance to impact the 2011 playoff race. Tennessee with Hasselbeck is still a below-average team. Ditto Minnesota and McNabb. But between the gaping hole at quarterback in Arizona last season (Derek Anderson, we will miss you) and a division where 7-9 got it done last season, Arizona is all of a sudden a 9-7 type team (which coincidentally was their record when they went to the Super Bowl in 2008).

Meanwhile, the Kolb trade opens the door for Vince Young, released today by the Titans, to sign on as Michael Vick's backup in Philly. There's a reality show in there somewhere.

3. After his Wednesday fleecing of the Washington Redskins for defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth, I'm convinced that if Bill Belichick were on Storage Wars, we would spend all season watching him find crates of gold bullion in storage units for which he paid like $300. Much like storage-unit auctioning, there's a science to what Belichick does, but for some reason he is the best. He buys low, sells high, and doesn't get emotionally attached. Often imitated, never duplicated.

In Haynesworth, the Patriots get the next tenant in Belichick's house for wayward NFL souls. Corey Dillon, Randy Moss, now Haynesworth. Somewhere inside the corpulent frame of the abandoned storage unit that is Albert Haynesworth, there is gold bullion. There has to be. After all, Storage War Bill only paid a 2013 fifth round pick for him.

(FUN RANDY MOSS FACT: In 2007, Belichick traded a fourth round pick to the Raiders for Moss, which sounded a tad askew when it happened and felt like Jedi mind trick by the time the Pats got to the bye week and it was like Moss 1999 all over again. The Raiders used that 2007 fourth rounder they got for Moss on cornerback John Bowie, who was last seen playing for the practically defunct Hartford Colonials of the UFL. Basically, If the Raiders were on Storage Wars, they'd be the guy who dropped two grand thinking he saw a Waterford Crystal egg in the unit and it turned out to just be an empty two-liter bottle of Sprite.)

And, just as I finish typing that last bullet point, wide receiver (and bull rider and soccer player and general pain in the ass) Chad Ochocinco signs with the Patriots. Yep, business is about to pick up.

Football is back.

Listen to Sean Pendergast on Sirius 94/XM 208 and 1560 The Game, and follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.

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3 comments
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SpareFoot
SpareFoot

Comparing Belichick's "luck" to Storage Wars is pretty telling. I'd bet you're a fan of the TV show, Sean, since there's probably 20 other equally apropos metaphors.

JB
JB

Timing fail, Sean. 

Thickwick
Thickwick

Laugh out loud - The Texans score 2 of the top 5 defensive backs available in this free agent class.  You missed this one bad!  If you had any sources inside the Texans' organization you would have known the truth - the Texans are going all in this season.

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