Damond Castle Discovers Pimpin' Ain't Easy

​Damond Castle dreamed of becoming a pimp. And while the 30-year-old calls himself "HoMoney" on his MySpace profile it seemed that his stable might have been a little skimpy two years ago. That was when, according to court testimony at his aggravated kidnapping trial last week in Bryan, he attempted to turn his former girlfriend out on the track.

It would be bad enough if that were all Castle did to her, but earlier this week, she testified that in September of 2008, Castle dragged her into his car by the hair, and then drove her around for hours, pistol-whipping and punching her and grilling her about who she was seeing. At one point he stripped her and sexually assaulted her, the woman testified.

A few weeks later, he was in Houston, where the cops spotted him allegedly trying to score drugs at a cheap motel. Castle led police on a car chase, and allegedly threatened to kill one of the cops. So now in addition to the aggravated kidnapping charge, Castle faced evading arrest, retaliation, and felon in possession of a weapon raps.

At a May 2009 court appearance for one of those cases, Judge Denise Collins cited him for "being belligerent in conduct," "disrespectful to officers of the court," and "general tomfoolery and unlimited assholery." Okay, Hair Balls made that last one up; seriously, though, Castle was found to be in contempt of court and sentenced to six months in jail with no time off for good behavior.

Turns out to have been a taste of things to come, as Castle's courtroom shenanigans here foreshadowed a bravura performance in Brazos County last week.

While his ex-girlfriend testified against him, he shouted "God bless you ... I ain't mad at you -- I swear to God," adding that he saw her as just a "poor black woman" who had been forced to testify against him.

He challenged the manhood of the police and prosecutors: "Y'all can at least be real men about this situation," he said.

He interrupted the Brazos County DA's closing arguments to interject that he was "rebuking" evil from the prosecutor. And as for the judge, he took a more resigned tone, at one point turning to him and sighing, "Judge, I wish I knew why you wanted to lock me up so bad."

Amazingly, Castle's legal tactics failed. He was convicted of aggravated kidnapping and sentenced 80 years in prison, which somehow managed to please Earl Gray, his attorney. Gray said given his lengthy criminal history, he was lucky to have avoided a life sentence.

And so ends the career of Damond Castle, would-be pimp...