Why Are The News People So Desperate?

Categories: Pop Rocks
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Have you seen that promo for KPRC news where Dominique Sachse and pals are wandering around a gigantic room, begging us to tell them what we want them to cover?

I've been searching for it on YouTube with no luck, but I think you know the one. Bill Balleza and Dom and the whole crew want us to e-mail them, to stop them on the street, to let them know what we want them to cover...because it's our news program. US! The citizens of Houston! We own those bitches!

And then there's all of this "Follow us on Twitter!" "Be our Facebook pal!" nonsense. It's certainly not just KPRC, I'm sure (although I'm admitting right now that those are my news peeps, yo). But honestly, doesn't it depress you a little that these journalists want us to tell them what to report on?

I don't think a brain surgeon would ask me to join him in the operating theater and suggest where to make that first incision. ("Doctor, I recommend cutting in the shape of a lightning bolt!") And I doubt an attorney would want me to waltz into court and offer up my advice. ("Try flirting with the jury members a little -- they look horny.")

I mean, I get that they want viewers, and they need us to feel loved so we continue to watch them. But as much as we make fun of television news people, shouldn't we expect them to make the best, most objective decisions about what to cover? Isn't that their job? If it were up to me, the news would be nothing but reviews of bars and updates on whether Britney Spears is still mentally stable. If it were up to Mr. Pop Rocks, it would be a program full of people talking about obscure jazz records. My father's news? Golf, golf, golf! And my mother's updates would highlight one home decorating tip after another, intermingled with recommendations for a good Scotch.

I don't want to be pals with Dominique Sachse (although I'm sure she's a lovely person). I want her to report the most important news of the day to me. That's why it's called The News and not Dominique Sachse and Pals. If she and her friends are getting story ideas and fulfilling requests from people who write on their Facebook wall, where will we get ourselves as a people? Sure, Britney Spears is important. But so is the shit going down at City Hall, you know?

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