Cruising For Hot, Gay, Anonymous, Public Sex -- A Guide

Our sister paper in Kansas City, the Pitch, has a feature on police cracking down on the gay cruising at one of KC's parks. (Gays in Kansas City? We knew this would happen if Obama got elected!!)

As part of it, they offered a survey of similar parks in other cities where Village Voice Media publishes. We did our part and offered Memorial Park, although we've never been quite sure where those legendary bathrooms are.

In the interest of double-checking that we weren't missing anything, we registered for a site the KC reporter mentioned, squirt.org. As the title indicates, it's a no-holds-barred discussion of where to get it on without developing a kind, loving, two-way emotional relationship.

The registration mandated giving up such details as cock size, but we soldiered on.
And found reviews like this:

Memorial Park -- Dude,,,I don't know how long you have lived in Houston, or what you know about Memorial Park. But Memorial Park might as well be a Houston Police Sub Station. If you suck cock in Memorial Park, there is a good chance you will get a free tour of The Houston City Jail. They will even put you up overnight. The food isn't very good, and the accommodations are less than Five Star, but you will get to meet some really nice people.

(So much for our advice. Sorry, guys!)

Gaslight Video in Bellaire -- Holy oxygen masks, Batman! Went at lunch time today, and it was pretty creepy. Everyone there was at least seventy, and they all knew each other. Not only that, but they kept talking about their plans for the weekend, people who died, what was going on in their 'stories' and other intimate details of their private lives. It was like Shipley's Do-Nuts in the mornings.

(That's just freakin' hilarious -- discussing the golf game while cruising in a video arcade.)

St. Luke's Episcopal Hospital -- Two stalls and two urinals. Plenty of recovery time. The lighting is dimmer due to the color of the tile inside the room. GREAT under the stall action! Who goes there: Doctors, male nurses, visitors, etc.

(A commenter disagreed, though: "whoever goes, is stupid. expect to be monitored as you go in the CAMERA outside the hall. and noted as to how long you (and whoever) stayed. have a clue guys. damn.")

Ah, the inventiveness of man. Especially the horny man.