The Chronicle's Doll Porn Ignores Houston's Syphillis Threat

Categories: Spaced City
dollporn041709.jpg
Photo courtesy the proud, hip Houston Chronicle

The godawful sex blogger on the Houston Chronicle's so-hip-it-hurts 29.95 blog has a new bag: Doll porn.

Each week she promises to demonstate a new sex position for all the rest of us unimaginative schlubs who just don't know how to bone it like they own it.

To do so, she'll be using dolls, as shown above. Hilariously (we assume), one is named Lucy, who is described this way: "She works in Houston as personal trainer and lives in Midtown. She went to school in Austin where she honed her sexual skills by methodically working through the majority of the frat houses in between classes."

The edginess!! It hurts!!!

Anyway, one things these dolls should worry about -- because they live in Houston -- is syphillis.

A local coalition of health-care groups is trying to warn Houstonians that they rank second on the country when it comes to new cases of the disease.

Their slogan: "Don't Sleep On It: Ignoring Syphilis Won't Make It Go Away."  (We guess they really are starting at Square One.)

The Syphilis Elimination Advisory Council (SEAC) will host the first annual Syphilis Awareness Day on Saturday, April 25, 2009 from 10:00am to 2:00pm at Prince Complex located at 3000 Jensen Road in northeast Houston.

Tests and educational information will be available.

Humans only, please. No dolls.


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