"Does This Bowtie Match My Grill?"

Categories: Spaced City
KPRC
Warning: This soundbyte may rhyme
Pop quiz: Which of these historic black leaders said: "You know I thug em, fuck em, love em, leave 'em/ 'cause I don't fuckin need 'em,/take 'em out the hood, keep 'em lookin' good/but I don't fuckin' feed 'em"?

A) Martin Luther King, Jr.
B) W.E.B. DuBois
C) Booker T. Washington
D) None of the above

Didja guess? OK — nope, even though the content is similar to Dr. King's lesser known "Letter From an East St. Louis Jail," the correct answer is "none of the above." That's because these magical words were uttered by Port Arthur's own Pimp C, a man whose own lyrics admits he rarely obeys the speed limit while driving his Benz. As you might guess by his name, Pimp C sings about the seedier aspects of life, which is why I thought it was weird that Houston activist Quanell X is planning on recording a song with C.

Quanell said the uplifting song will address black-on-black crime, among other issues.

"We were also going to talk in the song about the pain of brothers who are incarcerated, so the idea of us doing a song together was to encourage African-American men across the country to stop the killing," he said in a phone interview.

Quanell also said he "helped" Pimp C come home from jail.

"He was first Pimp C when he was a teenager," Quanell explains, "but he's now Pimp C the man. He's not Pimp C the little boy....And so there's been an evolutionary process."

While that answers the decades-old anthropological debate about homo pimpus, it begs the question: Isn't Quanell afraid that teaming up with a dude who raps about getting his "cobra head" sucked by a "yellow-ass ho" will make it look like he's endorsing the type of misogynistic, stereotypical savage-black-male propaganda he's supposed to be cutting down?

I was especially surprised because, a few months ago, Quanell complained to the Houston Defender about the lyrics of a song by T-Pain.

"It was obscene, derogatory statements that were pornographic in nature," the paper quoted him as saying. He was really fuming because his young daughter was in the car at the time the song came on.

Uhhh...OK. But T-Pain's "I'm N Luv With a Stripper" is about a dude who's in love. It's right there in the title! Pimp C doesn't talk about love, unless he mentions his AK, but that's more like masturbation, so that doesn't count.

And I wonder what Quanell's daughter would think about lines like "Get my money ho/I ain't playin'/bitch you heard what the fuck I'm sayin'/I'll bust you in your eye, ho, if you don't get out for the dough."

And I wonder what she'll think if she ever reads the part where Quanell told the Defender, "Where is the consistency from African-American leaders, where we will hold our own people accountable?"

Yeah, let's get some mothafuckin' irony up in this bitch, 'nomsain? -- Craig Malisow


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