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Joey Arcidiacono: Alleged victim might suffer a lifetime of blurred vision.

​Hard on the heels of another Midtown brawl, three young men have been charged with felony aggravated assault/serious bodily injury after a December 20 beatdown at Celtic Gardens on Louisiana Street in Midtown.

Steven Weil and Grant Woodruff, both 22 and from Bellaire, and Joey Arcidiacono, also 22 and from West University Place, have all made their $30,000 bonds. Likely in connection to this case, Arcidiacono's mother Mary Lee Arcidiacono was charged with misdemeanor interfering with the duties of a public servant when she allegedly attempted to drive away from a West U cop who had legally detained her on January 17.

According to courthouse documents, Weil, Woodruff, Arcidiacono and his brother Chris attempted to enter Celtic Gardens. The complaint states that Joey Arcidiacono entered without showing the doorman his ID and again refused to do so once he got in. While the bouncer was escorting Joey Arcidiacono out, he got into a discussion with Chris Arcidiacono, and that set Joey off.

"Who the fuck you talking to like that. You don't him [sic], that's my fucking brother," Joey Arcidiacono is alleged to have said.

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Now with Hlavaty goodness!!

​The eyes of a nation will be turned to the Giants v. Patriots Sunday.

Your eyes, however, should set aside some time for our live-blogging of the epic event.

Our Craig Hlavaty will be here at Hair Balls offering insight into what's going on both on and off the field, starting at about 5 p.m.

Seeing as how Madonna is the halftime entertainment, it's a good bet there will be some stuff worth checking out.

You can join in on the conversation via the comments section.

If there's anything that can improve the Super Bowl, it's this, so don't miss out.

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Follow Hair Balls News on Facebook and on Twitter @HairBallsNews.

Rich Oller, cutting-edge football analyst.

​Rich Oller, the acting city manager of League City, has been suspended for a week following a long closed-door council session investigating his use of the N-word at City Hall.

Yourbayareanews.com reports that Oller was discussing the previous night's BCS title game between LSU & Alabama last month with two city employees when he dropped the N-bomb in what was no doubt an astute analysis of the game.

An anonymous e-mail tipped off city council to the incident, and they investigated.

"Use of the N-word in a city facility, it's just not acceptable by our policies and just common decency," Councilman Andy Mann told the Galveston County Daily News.

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Danger lurks on Super Bowl Sunday.

​Earlier this week we brought you the solemn warning from Methodist Hospital, urging people to remember to pee during the Super Bowl.

If you don't, an expert said, you might end up in the ER with a catheter inserted into places you'd rather not have such things inserted.

But that is not the only way that experts say medical disasters, both life-threatening and otherwise, can mar your Super Bowl-viewing experience.

Among the warnings that have been given out, such dangers include:

5. Overfarting
Heed:

"The gluttonous marathon that is Super Bowl Sunday is tantamount to putting a 100-pound weight on a 10-pound hook when it comes to your gastrointestinal tract," says Bill Downs, a Philadelphia nutritionist and author of trafon.org, a self-proclaimed "fart blog." "We're talking big-time farting."

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Micah Powell / Lufkin Daily News

PasDoctor Geronimo unsuccessfully pleads his case yesterday afternoon

​Sadly, PasDoctor Geronimo's hoped-for 12-plus woman birthday orgy in a custom-built "tepee/tent-residence" on the Angelina County Courthouse lawn -- starring Cameron Diaz -- did not take place yesterday.

Jessica Cooley of the Lufkin Daily News was there for the dramatic confrontation.

She reported that Geronimo, a frequent miscreant whose "white man's name" is Douglas Paul McCoy, did show up at the appointed time.

He arrived on his bike with a bedroll, pillow and tepee-tent-residence on his back. He was wearing a Superman T-shirt, and sported a feather earring from his left ear and had his face streaked in war-paint. He was all geared up for what he had publicly promoted as a planned 12-plus woman all-night sex-a-thon "birthday extravanganza."

But such was not to be. Geronimo was met on the courthouse lawn by Angelina County Sheriff Kent Henson, who told the horny Indian outlaw that camping was prohibited within Lufkin city limits.

"Then y'all have me in a catch-22 situation. You'll arrest me for vagrancy, so just take me to jail," Geronimo told the sheriff, crossing his hands behind his back for ease of handcuffing. "I'm not going to Godtel, where I have someone tell me what I can do and when I do it -- telling me when to wake up and when to go to bed."

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The ribbon's been a bit charred this week.

​New Coke, you have a new rival for corporate ineptness.

In a statement on its Web site, the Texas-based Susan G. Komen breast-cancer organization has reversed its fiasco of a decision to cut off funds to Planned Parenthood.

We want to apologize to the American public for recent decisions that cast doubt upon our commitment to our mission of saving women's lives. The events of this week have been deeply unsettling for our supporters, partners and friends and all of us at Susan G. Komen. We have been distressed at the presumption that the changes made to our funding criteria were done for political reasons or to specifically penalize Planned Parenthood. They were not.

Sure they weren't. Good luck with that argument, Susan G.

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Hey Jim, while you're listening to fan suggestions, how about retiring J.R.'s jersey already?

​The word from on-high came earlier this week when the Houston Astros announced that Jim Crane had heard the voice of the fans and thus would not be changing the team's name. It's nice that Crane paid some attention to the people who buy tickets (though it does seem strange to see how many people complained, since it seems like everything I read said that people would no longer follow the team because it was being moved to the American League).

So since Crane's paying attention to the fans, here are a few more things he can do that should win over most of the baseball fans in the city.

20. Bulldoze Tal's Hill. And take that stupid choo-choo train with it.

19. You've said you're considering this, but just to reiterate, get rid of those ugly, boring, ugly uniforms the team's been wearing since 2000. The preferred option is to return to the classic late-1960s shooting star with dark blue caps and orange trim. Think of all of the cash you'll make with people buying the new merchandise.

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​We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them.

So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning, from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even.

This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula involving wit, clarity and whatever else we feel like at the moment.

We asked for help captioning a TMZ picture of a buff, shirtless Joel Osteen striding out of the water.

Readers came through, including one who took note of Osteen's hairless (but cut!!) chest.

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Each week, we take a dip into the Houston Press Flickr pool and see what our talented photographers have been up to. We're looking for pictures that represent the best of Houston, from food to art to events, to secret hidden spots of beauty. Just drop them in our Flickr group right here. Maybe you'll see them in this spot next week.

As always, for more information on a subject or photographer, just click on the photo.

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Kelly Clarkson: Take the under on anthem length.

​Finally, the Super Bowl is upon us, and when you head out to that neighborhood party this Sunday, you may need some fabricated incentive to have a rooting interest in the game. I get that.

Sure, you can do it the ultra-lame way by buying a couple squares for five bucks and hoping that you randomly secure the second digit of each teams' score at the end of each quarter. (And I mean ultra-lame with a capital ULTRA.)

Or you can get your sports fan pick-me-up through the exotic world of proposition wagers, a much more civilized, intelligent, "thinking man's" way to amp up the intrigue-o-meter.

So without further ado, here are a few of my favorite prop bets for this weekend and my pick for the game:

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