Avoid These 10 Foods If You Want to Get Lucky on Valentine's Day
2. Spicy foreign food you aren't used to
Photo by punctuated Do not eat these if you have any intention of doing anything other than going straight to bed after dinner.
I love an adventuresome guy. I appreciate a fellow willing to get out of his comfort zone and try a new dish or new cuisine that he's never encountered before. I think it's super-hot when a man shows he's open to new things. What's not super-hot is when he gets sick because his digestive system isn't really used to spicy curry, and he ends up spending the rest of the evening in the bathroom encouraging me to turn up the volume on the movie. There's a time and a place for adventuresome dining. Valentine's Day is probably not it. Know your limits, and know that not everyone is built to devour gallons of chile paste with every meal.
1. Hot wings
This is an anecdote straight from one of my male friends. It is 100 percent true. This guy -- let's call him Chad -- was out on a date with a girl, and they went to a wing restaurant, where he proceeded to eat a great number of atomic wings, the spiciest ones on the menu. Like ribs, wings can leave a distinctive ruddy stain around the mouth and on the fingertips, and chicken can get caught in the teeth, and the sauce can cause you to reek of garlic. But that was not the problem. No, the problem came later when the couple was back home in bed, enjoying a little foreplay. The two were engaging in something I believe the kids refer to as 69-ing, when the girl let out a shriek. Suddenly, she'd started burning...down there. They both sat up, unsure of what to do, while she continued screaming, tears now streaming down her face. It wasn't until later, while they were sitting awkwardly in bed, he with an embarrassed pallor, she with an ice pack between her legs, that they remembered the hot wings, and the capsaicin lingering on Chad's tongue.
They broke up the next week.
And that's why you never eat hot wings on dates.