Openings & Closings: Manly Cupcakes Can't Cut It

Categories: Restaurant News

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The sun has set on Ranch Bakery in Cypress.
How many Malaysian restaurants does it take to feed Houston? If you guessed two, you're correct. Proving that Houstonians like their Malaysian food in one single flavor -- Banana Leaf flavor -- newcomer Asam Laksa Malaysian closed this week in Chinatown. It could have also had something to do with the fact that Asam Laksa positioned itself directly in between the two virtually identical Banana Leafs that face each other on Bellaire Boulevard, but we'll never know for certain.

In other disappointing news, B-4-U-Eat reports that Ranch Bakery has closed less than a year after opening. May 4 would have been Ranch Bakery's first birthday, which could have been celebrated with one of its signature "manly" baked goods made by an owner who was "fed up with girly cupcakes." With the Cypress bakery's closure, men will once again have to resort to demeaning their digestive systems with deplorably feminine cakes.

Elsewhere in manly news, patio bar The Dogwood is now open in Midtown. It's co-owned by brothers Brad and Chad Womack -- you'll recognize Brad as a former "star" of "reality" TV show of The Bachelor -- and partner Jason Carrier, who assures Eater Houston that the bar will enforce a dubious-sounding "no douchebags" policy. One person's hipster is another person's street urchin; one person's douchebag is another person's dudebro.

In happier news, Eater Houston also reports that Shine's Car Care in the Heights has been torn down, making way for the eventual home of CK's Steakhouse -- the joint venture between Ronnie Killen of Killen's Steakhouse and Ricky Craig of Hubcap Grill.

And finally open as of last week is the much-anticipated Batanga, a tapas bar and Latin restaurant on Market Square. Our own Carla Soriano had a first look at the place this week, remarking that due in part to new bars and restaurants like Batanga, it's "evident that downtown is quite alive and well."



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17 comments
jennytulltx
jennytulltx

Oh, sorry to have missed the manly cupcake.  Now I am curious.

gossamersixteen
gossamersixteen topcommenter

There is no such thing as a manly cupcake. Sorry that's the sole domain of the fairer sex, and I'm ok with that.

Adam Halperin
Adam Halperin

So I'm guessing Brad and Chad wont be allowed to hang out at their own patio bar?

craig.hlavaty
craig.hlavaty moderator

"One person's hipster is another person's street urchin; one person's douchebag is another person's dudebro." Dickensian. 

Judi Hurwitt
Judi Hurwitt

Love, love, love the Houston Press food bogs... hate, hate, hate the comment and "In cased you missed it:" pop-ups!

charmgirl13
charmgirl13

Sorry to hear about Ranch Bakery. I hope they can find a great spot closer-in -- the in town brunch junkies alone would love it!

Kylejack
Kylejack topcommenter

The crowd in Dogwood the other night did look kinda douchey, but I will reserve judgement.

jasonofthesea
jasonofthesea

Bummer, John.  Sorry to hear that.

Looking forward to some great downtown fun

JBARH
JBARH

I hate seeing this in writing because it makes it feel even more real. Small correction- May 4 would have been 2 years for Ranch Bakery . Poor location did us in. John H- owner.

MadMac
MadMac topcommenter

Poetry.

jennytulltx
jennytulltx

@Judi Hurwitt Hate the comments?  But why????

Jalapeno
Jalapeno

@Judi Hurwitt Preach it sista!  I know I'm visiting less because of the obnoxious pop-ups.

MadMac
MadMac topcommenter

I dunno, @charmgirl13 Crave, Celebrity, Sugarbaby's, (cupcakes and stripers?) Sprinkles, Treat, sounds like GIRLY cupcake territory to me.

tlafaver
tlafaver

@JBARH No kidding?  WTF open a place on Barker Cypress way North, and assume there will be booming business?  The burbs are a tough market to crack.


MadMac
MadMac topcommenter

Cause nothing says fun like,"hey, kids, let's battle through HWY290/FM1960/BLT8 traffic for 6hrs to get a MANLY cupcake."

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