The Turducken Burger & 5 Other Ridiculous Burgers We'd Like to See Become a Reality

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Ever find that it's "simply impossible to settle on one protein to craft a burger?" ...Me neither.

But if you have faced that problem, have no fear! Top Chef All-Stars winner Richard Blais and the Web channel Tasted have teamed up to solve all of your single-meated-burger problems.

The solution "starts with the letter T...and ends with URDUCKEN."

My friends, allow me to introduce you to the Turducken Burger:

Now that Blais has "solved" this major "conundrum" in our lives (thank God!), you'd think all would be fine and dandy, right? Wrong.

You see, we here at Eating...Our Words don't like to rest on our (or okay, really Blais's) laurels, so we've come up with a few epic burgers of our own.

Here are 5 Ridiculous Burgers That We'd Love to See Become a Reality:


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Illustration by Monica Fuentes
5. The Fried Chicken & Waffles Burger

We all know and love chicken and waffles, so why not ditch the fork and knife and turn the whole shebang into an epic burger, amiright?

Imagine this: bacon-and-syrup-infused waffles stuffed with a buttermilk-soaked, tender and spicy fried chicken breast, sliced apples, shredded cheddar cheese, and more bacon -- just for good measure.

We suggest serving the burger with a vat of maple syrup, taking it all down with a tall glass of whiskey, then calling the nearest hospital.

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Illustration by Monica Fuentes







4. The Ultimate Breakfast Burger

This little guy takes an egg-topped burger to a whole new level.

First, we'd stuff a ground beef patty with links of bacon-wrapped breakfast sausage and some chopped-up Canadian bacon. Then we'd grill it, melt on a couple of slices of nutty gruyère, and top it with a schmear of fig jam and a sunny-side up egg.

And obviously, we'd serve it all inside a bun made out of a glazed doughnut...obviously.

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Illustration by Monica Fuentes




3. The Floucrabacop Burger

Okay, so the name Floucrabacop may be the worst homage to Turducken ever, but this seafood burger will (probably?) not be.

We're not just talking about a boring filet-o-fish sandwich here. No, our Floucrabacop "burger" would start with a bacon-wrapped scallop gently nestled inside a lump crab cake, which would then be not-so-gently nestled inside a filet of flounder. To finish, we'd throw that entire baby into a beer batter and deep-fry the shit out of it.

For serving? A slather of tartar sauce, a pile of fresh-cut french fries and a buttered and grilled poppy seed bun. NBD.



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3 comments
Kathy Stabe
Kathy Stabe

OK, I would totally eat the chicken and waffles one. That sounds delicious. And the lasagna one is super creative. Honestly, I'd probably eat that too.

gossamersixteen
gossamersixteen topcommenter

Gross; though I'm sure you've made Paula Dean and Cardiologists happy.

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