Openings & Closings: Manly Cupcakes and Tiff's Treats

Categories: Restaurant News

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Photo courtesy of Ranch Bakery
Get your manly face ready for some CUPCAKES WITH COJONES.
This week finds two new bakeries coming to town, which couldn't be more different from one another, as well as two extremely interesting pieces of gossip from our ever-reliable sources.

Ranch Bakery (5431 Barker Cypress, Suite 500), which describes itself as "Houston's first manly bakery," is having its grand opening on May 4 in the northwest part of town -- which is apparently starved for cupcakeries that feature testosterone-injected pastries. It's an eerily similar concept to New York's now-closed Butch Bakery, except without cupcake names that sound like gay male porn star aliases.

Ranch Bakery is the brainchild of former construction worker (so manly!) John Homrighausen, who was "fed up with girly cupcakes and boring menus." I was unaware that cupcakes were inherently gender normative, but I was clearly mistaken. Ranch Bakery will also feature manly kolaches, manly stuffed pretzels, manly Ding Dongs (ya rly) and manly pies. I'm assuming all of these manly baked goods are stuffed with jackhammers and sweaty bandannas and old copies of Penthouse, so eat at your own risk.

Meanwhile, Austin import Tiff's Treats (3800 Southwest Freeway, Suite 128) is opening this weekend and offering plenty of special promotions for its first customers. Tiff's will be selling its popular cookies for only $3 a dozen, with all proceeds go to benefit the Make-A-Wish Foundation®. The first 10 people in line at 9 a.m. will receive a $100 Tiff's Treats gift card, the next 10 will get a $20 gift card and the next 10 will get a $10 gift card -- so get there early.

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Photo by Troy Fields
The patio at BRC Gastropub is about to get a lot puppier.
Meanwhile in the Heights, farmers market (and catering) favorite Pure Catering will finally have a storefront operation of its own -- sort of. Chef James Ashley is partnering with the newly renamed Boomtown Coffee (242 West 19th Street), which was once known as Heights Ashbury but is now under entirely new ownership.

"Official: Pure Catering has a new Kitchen/home base!" said Ashley on Twitter last week. "Teaming up with the most creative @boomtowncoffee Heights." Ashley also posted plans for the newly redesigned kitchen and noted, "New project provides balance with alternative plating format, cooking techniques and methods. Innovation on the horizon."

In more happy news, BRC Gastropub is the city's newest restaurant to feature a dog-friendly patio. "We wanted to make the patio more cozy for any day of the week, so we added wrought-iron fencing, new tables, chairs, planters along with fun orange umbrellas," said general manager Josh Samples in a press release. The pub will also have disposable water bowls and treats, along with a planned puppy menu from Chef Lance Fegen. BRC joins 18 other Houston establishments that actively welcome (and are licensed to welcome, more importantly) pups on their patios.

Another Austin import aside from Tiff's Treats still has its eye on Houston: J. Black's Feel Good Lounge, which was supposed to open in the old Phil's BBQ space on Washington Avenue. Allison Wollam at the Houston Business Journal reports that J. Black's still plans to head to Houston eventually, but that the City's permitting process is making the move more difficult that anticipated. Imagine that.

Blind items of the week:

It's been everything from La Strada to a failed Tony Vallone venture, and now the building at 322 Westheimer will soon be trying on another identity -- but will this one stick? According to a source, its investors are "shutting down the Westheimer location [of Don Julio's] in two weeks and then after remodeling the old La Strada location, reopening as a high end Mexican steakhouse." You heard it here first.

In far more vexing news, rumors are swirling that Bruce Molzan -- he of unpaid wages at Ruggles and countless restaurant lawsuits -- is close to inking a deal with the owners of the Brownstone Cafe to start up yet another restaurant. A sucker may be born every minute, but Houston apparently has more than its fair share.



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Location Info

Venue

Map

Don Julio's Mexican Restaurant - CLOSED

322 Westheimer, Houston, TX

Category: Restaurant

Tiff's Treats

3800 SW Freeway, Houston, TX

Category: Restaurant

Ranch Bakery - CLOSED

5431 Barker Cypress Road, Houston, TX

Category: Restaurant

My Voice Nation Help
17 comments
Bruce R
Bruce R

I cannot wait to put on my assless chaps, stick a whip up my ass, and go to the Dude Ranch Bakery and grab a few John Holmes eclairs.

And yes, Katharine, cupcakes are like tampons.  For women.

 

MadMac
MadMac

Wonder if Ranch Bakery plans on serving Dr. Pepper 10 with their (no-doubt) lone-star-shaped cupcakes, since they're adopting that brilliant marketing ~ahem~ strategy. You know, for the 15-20 minutes they're open. Just saying.

Bcarpen1313
Bcarpen1313

 Is he also the owner of the Don Julio on Nasa Road 1?

Corey
Corey

Anyone happen to know when and why the Schlotskys at Westheimer and Montrose closed? Something to do with the property being sold?

Winddingn
Winddingn

The guy who owns  Don Julio's is a complete scheister. I hope he's not involved in the new place.

Thanks for nothing, COH
Thanks for nothing, COH

Phil's BBQ had the same issues when they were trying to open. It was one thing after another with the inspections. It sounds like someone in the permitting office is going above and beyond to prevent anyone from opening in that location. 

NND
NND

"A sucker may be born every minute, but Houston apparently has more than its fair share." -- aww damn!! 

FudLuvr72
FudLuvr72

Come on Bruce, don't act like you wouldnt be wearing those chaps and jamming stuff up there anyway, might as well give your partner a treat for the next time you get your salad tossed. (I bet MadMac will help you out there. Probably the only way he'll see any action.)

MadMac
MadMac

Comment of the day. Right there, y'all.

FudLuvr72
FudLuvr72

One wonders if MadMac ever ventures from the parental basement and actually visits establishments before sniping them? I am looking forward to their food. Everything looks amazing and fresh on their website and if it's half as good as it looks I think they will do fine. It's a shame they are so far out west, but we are planning a field trip. ( I am sure everyone will be able to recognize MadMac by their pasty skin and lack of social skills, probably wearing a Star Fleet Federation tshirt with Cheeto crumbs on it to boot.)

churchlady
churchlady

No kitschy Texas shaped items at Ranch Bakery-just good down home baked goods. Their homemade fried pies and kolaches are amazing. (They make their own bacon for them)

Liz Hale
Liz Hale

They also make alot of other items as well,

Dunstan32
Dunstan32

Yes. Multiple locations around the burbs.

Laavvocatessa
Laavvocatessa

New Schlotzsky's opened at Yale @ Waugh....am told same ownner/franchisee.

H_e_x
H_e_x

Do you have any details?

MadMac
MadMac

And, less than a year later, they're closed. Oh, btw, you'd know me by my Rebel Alliance helmet. I don't ride a motorcycle or bicycle, but the helmet helps deflect idiots drawn to my wit and magnetism.

Wuwu
Wuwu

The owner of Don Julio's should be ashamed of himself....it is the worst Mexican food know to man...in a great city like Houston to think you could open this crap and survive is really really sad....I get a kick out of folks how think they "know the business" and try to serve shit food, shit service and a shit concept...places like this have no chance to survive...this business is so hard and such skill is needed to make them a winner and this place just flat out stunk!

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