Top Chef: Texas and an Impromptu Tour of the Houston Press Offices
|Our TV viewing area!|
And then I remembered: the office has cable! Sort of. We have a 15-inch CRT TV that only has a weird blue tint to it - no other colors - and satellite. God only knows why one of those things is fancy and the other is worse than almost any piece of electronic equipment you could buy for $15 at Goodwill. But that's where I ended up. And because the entire episode of Top Chef ended up being as boring as expected, today's photos are not of anything to do with the competition and instead are a tour of the Houston Press offices by night. EXCITING.
In tonight's episode, the four remaining competitors get a fifth chef added back into the mix: Beverly. Fucking Beverly. Who has somehow battled her way out of Last Chance Kitchen - the companion webisodes that have been airing after Top Chef each week - and back onto the show proper. Literally no one is happy to see her. Including me. I really wanted Nyesha back.
|Our kitchen area! Eat your heart out, cheftestants!|
"I ended up with avocado; I didn't realize I grabbed that," says Beverly, which is just about the dumbest shit you'll hear all night. Because a fucking avocado feels like an apple. Or a shallot. Or a trout. Fuck off. An avocado distinctly feels like nothing else other than an avocado. See what I mean about how dumb this all is?
The winner of tonight's Quickfire has to choose between winning a car - a Toyota, of course - or immunity in the real competition. Who would NOT choose immunity? Who would choose a car that they HAVE TO PAY A SHITLOAD OF TAXES ON BECAUSE THEY WON IT ON A GAME SHOW instead of a shot at continuing in the very competition you came to Texas to win? My mind can't wrap itself around why this is even a decision. But then there's fucking Ed, who really wants that car for some godforsaken reason. Luckily, Sarah wins - and she's properly thrilled. She also smartly chooses the immunity, which Ed stupidly misinterprets as a lack of confidence. Dumbass.
Thankfully, the show brings something actually awesome out and introduces a line-up of the competitor's mentors, including heavy-hitter chefs Tony Montuano from Spiaggia and Tyson Cole from Uchi. There are a lot of tears, including from Paul. He cries so much, in fact, that he makes Sarah cry, makes Tyson Cole cry and makes me cry. These are the times when I both love and hate this show. I am so easily manipulated sometimes; aren't we all?