The 5 Dirtiest Lines from Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

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Willy Wonka wants you to ride his boat into this fudge tunnel. What?
Like a lot of kids, I grew up watching Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory all year round -- but especially during the holidays.

The movie is, to me, the best adaptation of a Roald Dahl book so far (just barely ahead of Matilda, of course). Gene Wilder plays the manic Willy Wonka with that perfect blend of childlike vision and humor along with twisted, dark, adult drives and desires -- a duality which was often explored in Dahl's books.

I rewatched the movie over the holidays with my parents, who'd never seen it before. Showing the classic children's movie to adults had some unintended consequences, however. Namely, the fact that a large majority of the lines in the movie seem to have been written purely as cheeky set-ups for the old "That's what she said!" punchline. That's Dahl for you, though.

As I noticed double entendre after double entendre, I started keeping track of them while I tried not to laugh too inappropriately in front of my parents. After all, we'd just gotten back from church.

5. "You can suck 'em and suck 'em and suck 'em, and they'll never get any smaller." -- Willy Wonka, on his newest creation: the Everlasting Gobstopper

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Mrs. Teevee before getting Lewinski'd by one of Wonka's creepy creations.
4. "Oh, my dress, my hair, my face!" -- Mrs. Teevee, after being sprayed bodily with bubble suds.

3. "Suck 'em and you can spit in seven different colors." -- Willy Wonka, about his Rainbow Drops. "Spitting's a dirty habit." -- Violet, in response.

2. "Hang on, darling! Just close your eyes and hang on tight!" -- Mr. Salt on the boat ride, as Willy Wonka maniacally chants, "Faster, faster!" in the background.

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Violet got all the good lines, yet a band named themselves after Veruca...
1. "It's hot and creamy. I can actually feel it running down my throat!" -- Violet, after eating a gumball that tastes like a three-course meal. (She was referring to tomato soup, but you could've fooled me.)



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14 comments
Jeremy Parzen
Jeremy Parzen

I LOVE that movie. It's funny how we didn't think of it as a "foodie" movie when it came out. Today, I see it in a completely different light...

And Katharine, I'm just going to take a moment here to say that I am your devoted fan! :) 

agorist
agorist

"Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."

BTW, Dahl hated this version of the movie - most of the lines quotes are from other literature, not his own book.  The more recent version is a more faithful adaption of the dialogue.  But, I still love the Willy Wonka version the best :)

Teto85
Teto85

I can just see Evan Stone as an Oompa Loompa.

Larry Fitzhue
Larry Fitzhue

Cartoons from back in the day (late 80's - mid 90's) were good for some dirty well place innuendos. The good ole days.

Brittanie Shey
Brittanie Shey

"The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!"

(Snozzberries = testicles.)

MadMac
MadMac

Thank God Mr. Funny Man, here never hooked up with that literary master of titles, Ian Flemming.

cryjack
cryjack

Hhhmmm...maybe that's why I've always been so attracted to Gene Wilder in this film.

Toque
Toque

#3.... Violet: "Spitting's a dirty habit."         Wonka: "I know a dirtier one..."

MadMac
MadMac

Billy and Mandy's Grimm Adventures and Cow and Chicken, without a doubt.

MadMac
MadMac

Can't wait to tell the Mrs. about this one. Bracing for the slap even as I type.

MadMac
MadMac

Eeewwwww, that's disgusting! Now Marty Feldman in "Young Frankenstein"...

MadMac
MadMac

You're sick!

Strange, normally I'm on the receiving end of that one.

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