Top 5: Worst Restaurant Parking Lots

Categories: Top Five

Top5ParkingYaYa.jpg
Houston's got them. You know them. Here are the worst.

5. Yia Yia Mary's Greek Kitchen

Maybe it's for a lack of intelligence, but I'm always in a complete state of confusion when I pull into this parking lot. In a 20-yard radius, you can park at a bank, a restaurant, a garage, various businesses, or even a church. There is some parking on the side of the restaurant, but it's always full. This throws me off, and I end up turning into the Comerica Bank drive-thru. Completely embarrassed, I speed away while mumbling, "I didn't want to eat a fucking gyro anyway." This is the truth, just ask my wife.

Top5ParkingHobbit.jpg
Hobbit Cafe.
4. Mi Sombrero

Mi Sombrero is a neighborhood place. I'm guessing many of you reading this have never heard of the restaurant. The food is very good. The parking lot--very bad. It's filled with loose gravel, crater-size potholes, and unmarked speed bumps that look like they've been beaten with a sledgehammer. I highly recommend Mi Sombrero, but please proceed with caution when entering this nightmare of a parking lot.

3. Vietnam Restaurant

The popular Heights restaurant is typically crowded on Friday evenings. The side parking is tight, but there's a semi-crappy extra lot in the back. That's not what lands this restaurant on list. It's those damn dips upon entry and exit--especially the exit. A newcomer could do a little damage to the front end of his vehicle if not paying attention. Take it slow, and you should be okay. On a side note, my last visit yielded disappointment in the culinary front. I'm hoping this was a bad night, because I've always enjoyed Vietnam Restaurant.

2. Big Woodrow's

Sometimes it's hard not to get personal. I'm about to get personal. Big Woodrow's lot isn't all that bad, but a large chunk of it is located behind the restaurant, and it's fairly dark back there. No big deal, until the night my shit got jacked from the car. One of my back windows got shattered and some books were stolen. Books! What is wrong with the world? Worst part--one of the power locks hasn't worked since. I hope it was a good read, you bastards.

1. Hobbit Café

Not putting the Hobbit Hole at No. 1 would have caused readers to start rioting in the streets. This parking lot represents the trifecta of fucked-up-ness. It's small, poorly maintained, and at the epicenter of several establishments. This is the Bernie Madoff of parking lots--screwing people over, with no end in sight. It's an odd combination of pavement, with scattered bricks throughout. Potholes are everywhere, and I've spent hours of my life trying to find a spot. Worst part--the Portsmouth Pothole. You know the one--the abyss as you're exiting the lot that could stop a military tank in its tracks.



Follow Eating Our Words on Facebook and on Twitter @EatingOurWords

Advertisement

My Voice Nation Help
27 comments
Adambevo
Adambevo

I hear you about Hobbit. The dent in my rear bumper is what you get when you combine that tight lot with a dumb 16 year old driver.

Darjae
Darjae

I'm amazed that Branchwater Tavern is not on this list. The parking lot has about 10 spaces. and Valet takes forever. At least BRC across the street got the lot next door for parking.

Kara Hagen
Kara Hagen

The original Barnaby's on Fairview also has the magical combination of inadequate chuckhole pkg lot + impossible street parking going for it.

Jim Ayres
Jim Ayres

No complaint about Vietnam's parking lot as I usually parallel on the street, but since you brought it up, on my last two visits (also on Friday nights) the food at Vietnam has been excruciatingly bad. Soup that tastes like an ashtray. Dishes made with "substitute" ingredients in the most random ways. Won't be back for a while, or until the next time I've got a lot of wine to bring!

Flimflamman
Flimflamman

the worst parking lots are the empty ones with orange cones blocking the spaces, and a valet sitting idly by

Jeeterbug
Jeeterbug

kevin--you need to go to kam's chinese on montrose...their parking would blow your top 5 out of the water for the worst!

trisch
trisch

Your thieves may be related to the ones who ripped off my friend's truck in the parking lot at a hotel on the I-35 frontage in New Braunfels. They jimmied the driver side door and stole a grocery bag full of old textbooks and a tired, old neoprene wetsuit. They left behind a box full of brand new GPS and marine radio equipment. The door lock has not worked since.

Bruce R
Bruce R

There's plenty of street parking near Hobbit. But I've noticed that the denizens of Houston prefer not to park in the street.

Cathi
Cathi

do you own a thesaurus or was that the book that was stolen?

Jor
Jor

Nippon's lot is pretty terrible. No guidance on which way to face, and the single lane entrance/exit opening on Montrose causes a lot of head-on confrontations.

kylejack
kylejack

The Tavern On Gray. Super lumpy.

Wootenanny
Wootenanny

Car parking at the Hobbit may suck, but the eagle, warg and magical horse parking is bar none.

Jemimagold
Jemimagold

I'm with you on the Hobbit/Blue Fish/Yelapa parking nightmare. This link shows an even better photo of the disastrous parking lot: http://swamplot.com/swamplot-s... Upon seeing that and other photos, a Yelapa person wrote in to complain that the parking lot was all the owner's fault and people were like, why didn't you address this in your lease contract before you moved in??

ThurstonH3
ThurstonH3

in fairness, it's actually the lot shared by yelapa, hobbit and blue fish house. and it's as bad as you say.

Ziggy's Montrose
Ziggy's Montrose

I'll own it. Our parking lot at Ziggy's Montrose sucks. And I have a sign to prove it. Maybe an honorary mention or your top 10 list.

Eric S
Eric S

Goode Co Taqueria deserves at least an honorable mention. When people park along the side of the patio, it makes backing out of the Westpark facing spots almost impossible. Also, the U shaped parking area behind the restaurant is tight and completely inadequate for the number of people the restaurant seats. I think it survives either through some ridiculous grandfather clause or outright bribery of city officials.

Kevin Shalin
Kevin Shalin

First, thank you for you comment. I couldn't agree more about Vietnam. Very disappointing experience. Something must have changed in the kitchen. I swear our entire order was out in five minutes. Too fast. My daughter complained about her egg drop soup. I thought she was just being whiny until I tried some...it was horrible. I sent it back, and I almost never do that. I really hope they get things straightened out.

Jessica
Jessica

Food at Tavern on Gray is horrible so it barely falls in the 'restaurant' category, which is subject of this article.

VMTS
VMTS

If only the Goblins knew how to park their Wargs

Tmem23
Tmem23

i dont think you can call yours a "lot"

Kevin Shalin
Kevin Shalin

Yes it is...just too good of a picture to pass up.

kylejack
kylejack

Hm, not so sure about that given Woodrow's inclusion.

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

Loading...