Top 5 Worst Thanksgiving Day Dishes

Categories: Top Five

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You know them all too well. Year after year, these dishes seem to find their way to the Thanksgiving table. Why must we be subjected to these horrible creations?

5. Instant Mashed Potatoes
Are our lives so busy that we must cut corners on this most sacred Thanksgiving dish? I say no. Instant mashed potatoes are the culinary version of giving the middle finger to your guests. As a child, in the summer of '88, I once ate instant mashed potatoes. And I promised never again. It is still a painful memory.

4. Lima Beans
Have you heard this one before? "...But we needed something green on the table." I thought that's what the cream of mushroom-smothered green beans were for. Guess not. Yes, they are healthy. But just the sight of them makes me cringe.

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3. Bad Gravy
Gravy is the tasty glue that holds the entire Thanksgiving meal together. It's the single most important, yet underrated item on the table. But watch out. There's always some brazen member of the family who's a self-anointed gravy expert. The result is lumpy, poorly seasoned gravy, and everyone suffers.

2. Gelatin Fruit Salad
Adorning the Thanksgiving table with gelatin fruit salad should be labeled a criminal act. The combination of various ingredients such as marshmallows, coconut, gelatin mix, and oranges results in a putrid dish. What purpose does it serve? If you want something sweet before dessert, grab a piece of pumpkin pie and call it an appetizer. You're allowed to do that on Thanksgiving.

1. Mincemeat Pie
Quite possibly the most vile culinary creation in the history of the universe. My mother-in-law makes this crap just about every year. She literally takes a bite of one piece and then throws the entire pie out. I think she takes some sadistic pleasure in it. About five years ago, I took my one bite. Imagine delving into a pie crust filled with cat shit. That's about where mincemeat pie falls on the food chain.

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