America's Best Bars: Not in Houston. Thanks, Playboy

What the hell does old-ass Hugh Hefner know about great bars anyway?! Playboy magazine will release a list they are calling "America's Best Bars" in the August issue and there are four from the state of Texas. Guess where they are. Two are in Austin, and two in Dallas.

I suppose I will give 'em Austin, as the original Continental Club is listed as a "Best Bar," and the Mean-Eyed Cat is listed in the "Best Dive Bar" category. Dallas comes in with Lee Harvey's as "Best Dive Bar" and something called The French Room & Rodeo Bar & Grill at the Hotel Adolphus as "Best Bar."

Sorry, but I would put Under the Volcano, The Ginger Man, The Petrol Station or Warren's up against a place called the Hotel Adolphus any day. It actually makes me wonder if a drink in a Houston bar even touched the silicone-injected lips of a Playboy staffer.

So I have two questions for you loyal readers and drinkers out there: Why does Houston continually get left off these kinds of lists, and what Houston bars should have been included? Cheers, and now everyone in Houston go cancel your Playboy subscription.