In news that will make us all feel a tad older, actress Michelle Pfeiffer turns 54 years old today. Last seen trying to sex up Zac Efron in New Year's Eve, Pfeiffer will next be in Dark Shadows, coming to theaters on May 11.

Her long and illustrious career has been marked by such classics as Scarface, The Age of Innocence and The Fabulous Baker Boys. Okay, Baker Boys isn't exactly a classic, but she was nominated for an Oscar for it. It's amazing what a blond in a red dress on a piano can do to the Academy.

But I think I, and many others, will love her forever in Batman Returns, as Selina Kyle/Catwoman, because, well, she was in stitched black leather the whole time and it was too much for my nine-year-old self to bear. She was pretty much everyone's crush in the late '80s and early '90s. I may have even asked Santa for her for Christmas one year.

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The new J Lo Kohl's ad, directed by Darren Aronofsky

In the most bizarre of bizzares, last week it was announced that a new J Lo/Kohl's commercial was being released. The commercial is promoting Lopez's Kohl's clothing line, and it features the singer/actress/entrepreneur/American Idol judge/mother of twins dancing around in her bright and lively Kohl's clothing. Of course, she is also singing.

Not at all surprising is that the commercial is terrible, but that's not what is unusual about it at all. What caught us off guard is that Academy Award-nominated Black Swan director Darren Aronofsky directed the spot. Aronofsky is no stranger to the small screen; last year he put out a series of anti-meth PSAs that were disturbingly brilliant. Creepy PSAs seem more like the director's M.O, but a Jenny from the Block ad? Does he really need the money that bad?

Aronofsky is certainly not the first big-name director to wade into television commercials' waters, but this spot might be one of the first to have none of the qualities of the auteur that created it.

To redeem film directors who have made commercials everywhere, here are the top ten commercials directed by actual (awesome) directors in film.

10. Ruben Fleischer: Zombieland, 30 Seconds Or Less

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The 2012 National Inventors Hall of Fame inductees were announced late last week and Steve Jobs, co-founder of both Apple and Pixar, with more than 300 patents under his belt, was posthumously honored. According to the Invent Now Web site, Jobs is credited "with revolutionizing entire industries, including personal computing, mobile phones, animated movies, digital publishing and retailing."

The National Inventors Hall of Fame was established in 1973 to honor some of the best patented inventions throughout history. Rifling through the Web site, there are tons of inventions you may never think of, or maybe even consider inventions, but they have changed the way we do things.

Here are our top ten most useful patented inventions.
10. Cereal - Patent No. 558,393

If Kellogg could only see how healthy his cereals would become!

Every morning when you pour yourself a nice bowl of Fruity Pebbles, do you ever think about how important cereal is to our daily existence? Flaked Cereal was patented by John Harvey Kellogg, who stumbled upon the idea by forgetting to properly store a slab of wheat dough. He turned the dough into flakes and fed them to patients at the wellness sanitarium he ran. They were such a hit, he patented the process. Can you imagine life without cereal? What would you single guys eat for dinner? And would the raisin industry even need to exist?

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This week marks 20 years since the debut of Wayne's World, and the first big-screen appearances by characters Wayne Campbell and Garth Algar, a duo from Aurora, Illinois, with a public-access show and penchant for babes and rock and roll.

This was also actor Mike Myers's first feature film, playing Campbell. He would go on, of course, to play Austin Powers and voice Shrek for the next decade and a half, and that unfortunate business that was The Love Guru.

WW is without question the second-best film to be made of a Saturday Night Live sketch, the first being the star-packed The Blues Brothers. The story of Campbell and Algar's misadventures with corporate America was also extremely influential on teen culture at the time, with the massive amount of catchphrases, cameos and hipness pummeling audiences in 1992.

A sequel, Wayne's World 2, followed in December 1993, just in time for the holidays, packed with a whole new gang of guest stars and musical guests. It would be the characters' last pop-culture moment until an MTV awards show a little more than a decade later.

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Today Jim Carrey turns 50 years old, and the rubber-faced fartsmith has been delighting millions since we first saw him on The Duck Factory. Or was it Once Bitten with Lauren Hutton? Or Fox's In Living Color? The man had a lot of career stops and starts before he started speaking out of his butt cheeks in 1994's Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.

I count myself as one of those millions who grew up with Carrey, from the Ventura movies, Dumb & Dumber, his turn as the Riddler in Batman Forever, and onto Man On The Moon, which saw him inhabit the spirit of his hero, auteur Andy Kaufman. There was nothing he could do wrong.

Who could forget The Mask, the last and only movie where Cameron Diaz was attractive? I even loved The Cable Guy, when everyone called it over-reaching garbage. I was 13 at the time, but still...

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Lohan official Jew.

The other night we happened to catch that classic Seinfeld episode where Seinfeld's dentist converts to Judaism and Jerry gets all up in arms about it. What's so funny about Jerry's miff is that he's not upset that the guy isn't taking the religion seriously; no, he thinks his dentist converted so that he will have the ability to tell Jewish jokes.

Changing religions is a big to do, especially in the Jewish faith. There are tests, written and emotionally, Rabbis are known to actively dissuade a convert wannabe. There's studying of books and being drilled in Jewish court, but it's worth it in the end -- because then you have the right to eight nights of presents!

That's right, Hannukah is upon us and unlike that other December holiday, (which will go unnamed) Hannukah isn't a one-day present affair. The presents go on for over a week. Sure, you might get a night of socks or Hanes T-shirts, but who cares, tomorrow will bring some other wonderful (practical) gift.

In Hollywood changing religion is as common as changing Gucci bags, you can just buy a new one. But you can't buy into Judaism, so why do so many make the switch? Obviously, the majority believe in the religion, but is it possible that some are making the switch for the presents? Either way, there are a lot of Jewish converts out there in La La Land, and we've found our top ten.

Art Attack's top ten celebrity Jewish converts:

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It was 30 years ago today that Natalie Wood's corpse was found floating off the coast of Southern California's Catalina Island. The 43-year old star of films such as West Side Story, Rebel Without a Cause, The Searchers, Sex and the Single Girl and many other classics had been aboard the Splendour, with her husband Robert Wagner and their friend, actor Christopher Walken.

Yes. That....Christopher....Walken.

She left behind two young daughters, Natasha Gregson and Courtney Wagner. Natasha became an actress by the early '90s on the big and small screens, doing time on ER, House and Ally McBeal. Us nerds know her best from High Fidelity as the last girl that Rob flirts with before going all in with Laura.

Details of her tragic death and the circumstances of that evening have always been sketchy for some, and this past week the case was reopened. New facts continue to surface, even three decades after the fact. A report today states that she hung on to the yacht's dinghy before drowning in the water, and could have been saved.

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Whatever, TL;DR, Yawn...

The dream of a new Camelot died this week as Kim Kardashian and hubby Kris Humphries called their 72-day marriage off on Monday. From the start everyone on the outside just assumed this was a business partnership to sell ad space on E!, while everyone involved feigned happiness and tears as the engagement, preparations and wedding were covered breathlessly as if Baby Kim was trapped in a well in a backyard Midland.

For the few instances we watched the corporate-made couple interact, Kardashian would chirp and flutter her eyelids skyward towards Humphries while he would try his best not to hit his head on door frames and remember to breathe.

This marriage went longer than we all expected, and didn't even have to end in a tearful 911 call to the Las Vegas PD like all the cooler short-term unions. Keep in mind still that these two could get married, but that a gay couple joining hands and tax forms in front of God will bring about floods, zombies and the destruction of the Holy Whatever.

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Photo By Craig Hlavaty

This magically pulled up behind the banquet hall...

This past weekend was my ten-year high school reunion. In the weeks leading up to the events -- the high school football game, the mixer, the family picnic and the actual reunion event -- I started asking people around me what to expect. All I knew about these things was what I had seen on movies and television, and my own parents' experiences.

The advent of Facebook for the past decade has made reunions not so much obsolete but just a little less of an event. You can catch up online, message back and forth, and look at each other's lives, significant others, spouses, pets, houses and children.

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Photo By Harmony Gerber / Shutterstock.com

This week actress Susan Sarandon turned 65, and the star of such films as Dead Man Walking, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Thelma & Louise, and Bull Durham is obviously one of the hottest of the older grand dames in Hollywood. Her turn in Elizabethtown is probably my favorite though.

Her daughter Eva Amurri is continuing the legacy in her own right. You probably saw her sort of not clothed in a few episodes of Californication too. She also looks scarily like her mother too.

Mama Sarandon made headlines this past week when she showed up at an Occupy Wall Street rally in New York, and the actress has always been a liberal firebrand, especially during her 21-year relationship with actor Tim Robbins.

Even at 65 years of age Sarandon is still one of the most attractive women in cinema, proving that age doesn't matter, as long as you have somehow made a deal with the Devil to manage to make men one-fifth your age break their necks to look at you ten years past retirement age.

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