So, you're standing at a bar, and some over-cologned dude who's sporting sunglasses indoors slides in next to you and says the following:
"Do you want to see something swell?"
And then he proceeds to look down at his crotch. No. Just no. These are situations that should never happen, and yet they do, often. Horrid pickup lines are hilarious anecdotally, but they're utterly uncomfortable in the moment. Nothing says "I need mace" like a stranger's crotch-reference. Especially when alcohol is involved.
So listen, guys. No matter what Mystery, the eyeliner-sporting "pickup artist" told you in his book, or what your boys told you about "negging" or whatever, it is never a good idea to use a stupid pickup line.
Here are some of the worst pickup lines ever, just in case you were planning to use any of them during tonight's bar-prowl.
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