Pop Rocks: Binge Watching Scandal Is Not a Good Idea

Categories: Pop Rocks

Lena Dunham's SNL parody of Scandal is how I felt about 15 episodes in.
I had heard a lot about Scandal, the ABC political drama starring Kerry Washington as a D.C. fixer who is involved in an affair with the President. I was never certain if I wanted to watch it, but there it was staring my wife and me in the face on Netflix in the middle of a boring summer of reruns. And I had recently seen the hilarious parody skit on SNL featuring Lena Dunham from Girls as the confused new "gladiator," and figured what the hell.

It wasn't until I was three or four episodes in that I realized Dunham and I had the same problem.

I enjoy serial dramas. I've watched Bones fairly religiously since its start and there is nothing more addictive than a good CSI or Law and Order marathon -- but not the Special Victims Unit because that shit is depressing -- but I spent so much time trying to figuring out how and why anyone was doing anything on Scandal until my binge watching began to morph into a fairly stout form of hate watching and it left me with questions...and these are just the five that I could list without feeling more shame.

5. Why did Quinn and Abby get creepy makeovers after Season One?

There was an episode of The Simpsons in which Homer invented a makeup gun. He shot it at Marge but hit the wall in a giant clown-colored splatter to which Marge responded, "You must have set it to whore." I'm no makeup expert. I even avoid eye contact when walking past the Clinique counter at Macy's. But even I can see that the makeovers to Quinn and Abby were not only unnecessary but ridiculous. It's like they hired a pageant mom to do it.

4. Could they have made Hollis any more of a southern caricature?

The only way the corrupt energy guy could be any more cartoonish is if they dressed him in chaps and boots, and let him yell, "Yee haw!" every episode. I'm shocked he doesn't carry a six shooter with him at all times and complain about open carry laws. Where is the giant steer head on the wall of his office and can someone get this man some cowhide chairs? If I ever see him driving and he's not in a pickup, I am turning off the TV.

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I also binge watched this show this summer, and I have to say that I pretty much agree with you on all accounts.  However, some of the characters actually do get some pretty great development as the show goes on, and Mellie actually becomes one of the most interesting people on the show.

It's still insanely ridiculous and unbelievable, and I think Fitz is the WORST and Olivia is an idiot for acting so stupidly around him.

I'm still going to watch it this fall, though. It is what it is.

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