Reality Bites: Ice Cold Gold

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Not a scene from the next "Hobbit" movie.
John (prospector) and Chad (dredger) are not the most motivated of fellows, much to everyone else's consternation. Americo (driller) is the biggest dude present, and also complains the most. Well, him or "Gator" (excavation expert). The only thing funnier than the poorly acted indignation among the dredge team are the swarming bugs that end up in everybody's mouths. I guess that satisfies the network's minimum animal requirement.

They finally get the dredge in the water, and the possibility that a guy in a wetsuit manning a hose in two feet of water might, I don't know, drown is presented as a serious problem. A day and a half's work yields one [maybe] ruby about the size of my thumbnail. Totally worth it, he said sarcastically. Then again, I'm not an "excavation expert," so what do I know?

Meanwhile, back on the glacier, "Winter is looming." Or so the narrator ominously reminds us. Aside from the convenient piggybacking on Game of Thrones, it points out some unpleasant environmental realities. The most pressing being death by freezing, but there's a bigger picture. For as the duo points out, the Eqi ice sheet covered the land they're hiking on not ten years ago. Now, it's open for any crazy persons looking to strike it rich.

Give human beings credit, they'll find a way to make a buck out of anything, even the impending death of their species. *Especially* that.

But never mind that now: "Quartz! Copper! Pyrite!" Josh thinks the signs are promising that they're in the Gold Zone. As proof, he proudly displays a few flakes that wouldn't cover one of Li'l way. "That mountain could be full of gold." But we'll have to wait until the season finale to find out for sure.

By my highly scientific (Google search) count, there are at least six gold prospecting shows currently on TV. Certainly, most of the current crop are somewhat more sophisticated than Spur from The Man From Snowy River, but not much. And I bet none of them can make wallaby stew, either.


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