5 Reasons Handing Out Anti-Obesity Letters to Trick-Or-Treaters Is a Bad Idea

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Photo by AForestFrolic

Turns out there is something more rotten than those pumpkins that will soon be melting down your front steps, and they're called "anti-obesity fliers."

Yeah, anti-obesity fliers. Those are a thing now, courtesy of "Cheryl," a concerned resident of Fargo, North Dakota, who called her local radio station, WRIG, to explain her plan for attacking the childhood obesity crisis this Halloween, and it's a doozy. A rotten pumpkin doozy.

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Image via y94.com.
See, Cheryl has decided that she's now the fat police of Fargo. If your trick-or-treater doesn't meet Cheryl's height/weight restrictions, he or she will be handed a stern letter about how obese children should not consume sugar in place of that fun-size Snickers bar, because that's what nice people do to little kids on Halloween. Yeah, she's awesome.

As ill-advised as I find her plan, I'll give Cheryl the benefit of the doubt here, though, and say perhaps her plan was hatched in real concern for the childhood obesity epidemic. But even if intentions were indeed noble, there are a few concerns that I, as a parent, have with Cheryl's anti-obesity plan.

The main concern? Her plan flat-out sucks, and it's not going to work because it's fat-shaming.

But let's dig a little deeper on this one, shall we? Let's go past the obvious plan-sucking, and look at the hazards of handing out anti-obesity letters in place of candy this Halloween. Because yeah, it's an awful idea, and even if for some strange reason Cheryl's plan makes total sense to you, you really shouldn't follow suit. Especially if you like your car windows sans egg.

Here are five reasons you should never, ever hand out anti-obesity letters to random children, ever. Ever.

5. You say tomato, I say tomaaaahto. The kid may not actually be obese. Or hey! They may have some sort of medical issue that's none of your fat-shaming business.
Rational thought, I know. It's so hard to commit to. But you, Cheryl, are not a doctor -- and even if you are, which I highly doubt, you are not my child's doctor -- and therefore should not be doling out medical opinion disguised as concern. There are plenty of parameters in which you are not qualified to judge a child's overall health, especially if it's based on your eyeballing of their body fat percentage.

Oh, and God forbid the kid has a medical condition in which his little belly or body doesn't show much muscle tone. I mean, are kids with Down Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy exempt from your judgment of their obesity, or are they also included in this sham? Perhaps you can also hand out medical pamphlets on their specific conditions too, in case those parents aren't adequately educated? Y'know, cause you're all medical genius and stuff.

4. You weren't invited to be a provide input on my parenting plan, even if you think you know what's best.
My child didn't come out of your uterus, and therefore he or she doesn't belong to you. I know you seem to think your village is raising my child, as you so clearly stated in your fat-shaming letter to my 7-year-old, but no uterus, no vote on how much -- or little -- candy they get this Halloween. That's my job, and I'll decide based on what I have decided is best for them, not what you have imposed on them.

3. Your "concern" is likely to do real damage to real kids. Causing body image issues should be an equal concern for you.
Your letter could do real damage to my child, and you won't be the one cleaning up the pieces of your fat shaming. I will be, though, and your lack of concern for my child's well-being, outside of the parameters of "obesity," concern me.

Whether my kid is fat or thin is neither here nor there -- they're a kid, first and foremost -- and they are developing ideas about themselves that will impact the rest of their lives. Don't be the reason my daughter can't look in the mirror at 20.

If you don't want to give fat kids candy, shut your door, turn off your light, and go to bed. But don't shame little kids into body image issues because you're unhappy with yourself. It's not your job to screw up kids that you don't have to fix later on.


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12 comments
Jeff Hill
Jeff Hill

Anybody know the results? If she really went through with it? I hope some kid took care of her car windows with a bb gun.

Thuy Vi Le
Thuy Vi Le

I'll just hand out carrot sticks and ranch.

FattyFatBastard
FattyFatBastard topcommenter

The letter was stupid, but the vitriol in this article is just, well, apparently this hit a lil' too close to home.

MadMac
MadMac

Who does this? Who takes the holiday especially intended for children and then assaults children? I agree with Ms. Missyjane, if my higher power of choice had blessed me with a fat buddle o' joy--and believe me any kid o' mine would be fat--and they got a letter like this, I'd need bail. Trust.

ducttaperoses
ducttaperoses

Virtually every single one of my costumes was one of those baggy-jumpsuit-type animal costumes.  They all made me look obese, even though I wasn't.  Even if this were any of her business, which it's not, I can't think of a less reliable time to try to judge someone else's body type than on Hallowe'en, when they're probably weary 47 layers of costume.

Pip Rushing
Pip Rushing

I think the idea is to stop making these companies rich and quit feeding youre kids chemicals.there are alot of all natural chocolates and other candies.taste much better and they arent made with chemicals.

Ali Rizvi
Ali Rizvi

She should throw in some metamfetamine-based appetite suppressants.

missyjane
missyjane

Well said. If my kid got one of these, egg would be the least of that woman's problems.

Pip Rushing
Pip Rushing

And without these values big pharmie wouldnt profit off youre kid when he gets older.

Pip Rushing
Pip Rushing

After all its just a health epidemic.

jamesv12345
jamesv12345

@Pip Rushing 

Pip you stupid fuckin,( im guessin) liberal cocksucker.

You inferred this how?

How do you make the jump to that and throw support at this idiotic woman.

Im guessin again you have no children because you sound like you have no idea what the fuck your talkin about.

Did the fat kid hatin bitch mention anywhere in her latter that she was providing organic treats for the kids she deemed worthy.

Child hood should be free of fucked up judgmental know it all cunts like you and

that narrow minded bitch.

Fuck the both of you, burn in hell.(Even though your godless ass doesn't believe in it.)

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