A Boy Gamer's Guide to Dating Girls Without Being a Douchebag

Categories: Gaming

I have a pathologically unhealthy obsession with misogynists in general and gamer misogynists in particular. I read their Reddit threads, click on their blogs, and just overall expose myself to such radioactive stupidity that I'm surprised I don't turn into one when the moon is full.

My favorite conceit out of all of this lunacy is this never-ending whine about how once upon a time girls made fun of guys for playing video games, and now want acceptance as gamers because gaming is "cool." I love this idea because it tells me everything I need to know about the person saying it, and it got me thinking that a lot of these people don't realize that being gamers is not what is causing women to throw things at them. To quote Captain Jack Sparrow, "The problem isn't the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem."

So me, in my eternal quest to try and bring the sexes together, I thought I would hand out some helpful advice gleaned from the many women I talked to on this subject recently. When you're a hardcore gamer dating a girl, here's some things you need to understand.

See also: Goodbye PS2, You Caused Me Much Grief

Yes, Some Girls Think That Gaming is Infantile and Stupid, and You Need to Get Over That: Let's set aside gaming for a moment to make a comparison. Remember when you were a teenager and some job wanted you to cut your hair, remove your nose ring, or wear a belt, and you stood up and screamed, "No one tells me how to be, The Man! You can't change who I am!"

That inherent belief that every single aspect of your life is sacred ground that must never be sullied is a hallmark of the last bit of psychopathy left over form being an infant. A woman that you're interested in is not required to consider gaming anything, be it a plus or a minus. Some people, men and women, just don't think highly of the pursuit, and you can either accept that and move on, or you can make someone's personal opinion about a hobby some grand (Read: stupid) sweeping statement on behalf of 50 percent of the population.

You Are Going to Have to Give Up Some Gaming Time: It seems so very, very simple, but a lot of people don't seem to realize what the point of being a couple actually is. The idea is that you spend time together doing things that involve one another because you like it. It's not because saying you're dating is cheaper than prostitutes and more fun than masturbating. There is another person you have to consider.

If you're not dating a gamer, you're not going to be able to pull marathon runs of play all the time now, and that is a perfectly reasonable request from someone that you've made an implicit promise to devote some considerable energy to. Even if she is a gamer...

Piece continues on next page.

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Aww. I had no idea until yesterday that my husband is a Call of Duty fan.  We came across the latest iteration while shopping at Target yesterday, and he got all excited. Fifa, Assassin's Creed, Batman and Grand Theft I knew about; this I had no idea.    He said he doesn't play it around me because he knows that I don't like games where he kills people. There are two versions in my house, and I had no idea. And it's not like he has his own TV for gaming. 

And he won't let me see any of the wolves in Assassins Creed 3(?).   

The Xbox is his.  I play Candy Crush on my ipad and laptop and phone. We coexist fairly well.  It helps that he works at home and has a job where he can take an hour or so to play a game while I'm not around.  


I may never get over your "purpose of a girlfriend" description. Good article, but that was unforgettable.

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