5 Things Missing From the Ender's Game Trailer (Spoiler Alert)

Categories: Film and TV

It's finally here, the trailer for Gavin Hood's film adaptation of Orson Scott Card's celebrated science fiction novel Ender's Game! It's easily one of my favorite books of all time, and I must have stolen at least four copies since I learned about Card's virulent homophobia and contributions to hate groups. I'll probably do the same with the film because while piracy isn't a victimless crime as my DVDs keep telling me, neither is cutting Orson Scott Card a big check.

But never mind that, the movie looks tremendous. You've got to love any flick that managed to talk Harrison Ford back into space, and the battle scenes look amazing. It's definitely going to be a triumph.

Yet the trailer appears to have left out things from the book that I vividly remember. Maybe they're in the film. Maybe not. I understand why somebody wouldn't try to tease an evening at the movies with...

Flashback
5 Horrible Lessons Ender's Game Teaches Kids

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Big Group Children Shower Scenes: For a guy that is so vehemently opposed to same-sex relationships the novel is one of the gayest things I have ever read in places. At its heart Ender's Game is the story of a boy who grows up training to fight the most important war in the world alongside the soldiers he will command. It's like Harry Potter, in a sense.

Except J.K. Rowling didn't constantly describe the Hogwarts students walking around naked, taking showers together that end in blood, soapy grappling matches, and students that sit with their laptops on their crotches using a holographic display to show off CGI floppy dongs. Don't worry, most of the girls that attend the battle school also spend their time in the barracks naked, but Card assures us that at their young age their bodies are mostly indistinguishable from a boy's.

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Ender Straight Up Kicking a Dude to Death: Ender has been monitored his whole life, had his entire genetic code analyzed, so that the armed forces could be sure that this right here was the perfect living weapon. That means he has spent most of his youth as an outcast, and we all know what happens when you dye a monkey pink and throw him in a cage filled with black ones.

The final act that convinces the higher ups that Ender is the chosen one is when he gets into a fight after his brain monitor is removed. A local bully takes this opportunity to get some friends and try to beat up Ender who they now think isn't being watched. Ender gets the bully down with a lucky shot, and proceeds to methodically kick the bully in the face until his freakin' brain leaks out. Jeez.. in America we just have to turn our heads and cough to get into the army.



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11 comments
DonnaDonna
DonnaDonna

Well, it doesn't seem just to be the last point, since you pretty much don't give the movie a chance from the very beginning of your article on. I get that you aren't paid to give a balanced critique, but to write something flashy that people can rub against. But calling the mind game torture porn (I see neither torture nor porn in it) and saying that Ender kicks Stilson until his brain is on the floor (which is not true; Stilson bleeds, but he dies later in hospital, and Ender doesn't know about it) is just sensationalist and deceiving.

Also, why you would like to see these things you so clearly disapprove of in the trailer is beyond me. In the dramatic narration of the movie they make sense, in a trailer they would just be gratuitously violent. But then, you weren't really criticizing the trailer, but judging the movie based on your own expectations anyway.

eudemonist
eudemonist

It's ok to steal from people as long as you disagree with their pesonal beliefs, right? Just because somebody spent their whole life creating art I enjoy doesn't mean they deserve to be compensated for their work! Doodyheads should not be allowed property, intellectual or otherwise; they should be slaves to the right-thinking people.

MadMac
MadMac topcommenter

I predict it will do smashing business, a al "The 300," glam-packed xenophobia, homophobia, (irony, again) and fascism. Or, it'll crash and burn which will further restrict scifi to LucasDisneySmithCruise. In my view, a lose-lose.

JefWithOneF
JefWithOneF topcommenter

@DonnaDonna I can't imagine why someone who judge a trailer for a film adaptation of a book he's read a dozen times on his expectations </sarcasm>

JefWithOneF
JefWithOneF topcommenter

@eudemonist As a content creator who has seen his works stolen and redistributed for almost a decade now, the author invites you aboard the whambulance. 

eudemonist
eudemonist

@JefWithOneF I guess as long as you get to make someone else a victim, too, it all comes out in the wash.  Dunno if one big circle of fucking over people we don't like is a good way to build a society, but I guess I'm not very enlightened.

Know any good places to download your books, or do I have to steal them from a storefront?  I'd like to read them, but I don't feel I can support your position on piracy...

JefWithOneF
JefWithOneF topcommenter

@eudemonist Possibly. I'm a troublemaker by nature. And you have a point, but I stand by what I said. Steal the book or steal the movie if you want to see it. It's less morally reprehensible that paying for it. That's my take. I accept that others feel differently.

But you see, I've bought tons of his books before this all came to light... back before I knew where my cash was going. I feel like I was robbed. I thought I was supporting a creator. I wasn't. I was supporting a cause, a repellent one.

So maybe it's just petty revenge from a disillusioned manchild who can't let finding out his hero was a prat go. I won't argue that maybe it.

But part of the lesson of that novel is to make up your own rules of the game if you are to survive. This is me doing that. What else can I say? I expect no less or more of anyone that feels the same about my own work.  

eudemonist
eudemonist

@JefWithOneF Now that I reread the byline, it makes sense.  Not super-clear though, no.

You can totally "not pay" for his books, and that would be a principled stand to take, denying yourself the enjoyment of consuming his product based on your ethical convictions.

Stealing the product, however, is wrong no matter how you try to justify it.  Money and product are effectively the same thing, and as a content creator yourself, you should know and recognize that, I think.  You're simply endorsing vigilantism.

JefWithOneF
JefWithOneF topcommenter

@eudemonist @JefWithOneF New story in an anthology with other authors. Should maybe make that more clear in the byline, you think?

There is a difference, in my opinion. Emptying his bank account would be taking away what others have already deemed him worthy of accepting, where as me not paying for his books denies him what I think he's worthy of accepting. Narrow line/slippery slope, I know, but that's how I think of it. 

eudemonist
eudemonist

@JefWithOneF Ah, thought you had a new one out.

So, your position is that stealing from a person to get something you desire (in this case, entertainment media) is totally cool, as long as that person may spend money on something you dislike? 

I guess emptying his (or your) bank account because I want money and disagree with his (or your) ideas of how that money should be spend would actually be a morally proper thing to do, then?

JefWithOneF
JefWithOneF topcommenter

@eudemonist @JefWithOneF Again, boo hoo. I'm not going to feel sorry for Card if people steal his work rather than see their money spent on hate groups. I will not call piracy a greater moral failing than that. It's my position. 

I meant my albums and reposting my articles without linking back. To my knowledge no one has pirated my single book yet. Probably because the only people who care are willing to spend $.99. Still, type "black math experiment" into any torrent search and I'm there. 

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