1993: The Greatest Year for Movies in the History of Movies Ever?
I mean, in what other year could cinema reach the heights of Schindler's List, Philadelphia, The Piano, Tombstone, The Fugitive, True Romance and Short Cuts while also providing us with Demolition Man, Leprechaun and Surf Ninjas?
The year 1993 was awesome.
Let's see, 1993, of course, that year after 1992 and before 1994, when gangster rap and grunge were still king and we were begging our parents for Zubaz pants.
And I haven't even mentioned Falling Down, Groundhog Day, What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, Grumpy Old Men, Dazed And Confused and Mrs. Doubtfire.
In just weeks, Jurassic Park will be re-released in 3D for nostalgic Gen-Y dopes like me to enjoy all over again. Hold on to your butts.
How many of these movies from 1993 could I watch over and over again? Almost all of them. Even the underrated presidential comedy Dave, with Kevin Kline and Sigourney Weaver. That film introduced me to the magic of Frank Langella, Kevin Dunn and Ving Rhames.
Sure, 1993 also featured Cop & A Half, Mr. Nanny and Super Mario Bros. stinking up the theaters, but if you see any of those on basic cable, you stop folding laundry for at least five minutes.
Last Action Hero
The heartwarming tale of Danny Madigan finding a father figure in the hard-bitten Jack Slater gets me every time, and I listen to AC/DC's "Big Gun" to cheer myself up on bad days. Plus, it's an Arnold movie, which immediately makes it better than most things.
Dennis The Menace
Mason Gamble and Walter Matthau (rocking a late-career renaissance) breathe life into the Menace world, while Christopher Lloyd plays the grodiest pedophile around. Gamble would spend the late '90s in Houston filming Rushmore and Arlington Road, oddly enough.
A new Michael Jackson song, the lovely Lori Petty and another nickname for fat kids all over the world to endure was all we got out of Free Willy.
My Boyfriend's Back
Johnny Dingle was a teen zombie before teen zombie could be sexy. Look for Philip Seymour Hoffman and Matthew Fox as high school kids, too. Let's hope no one ever remakes this one. Wait, did Warm Bodies count?
The '90s loved ninjas. There were 3 Ninjas, a Beverly Hills Ninja, turtles that were ninjas, and even American ninjas.
Addams Family Values
The sequel to the surprise 1991 hit was a bit forced (the title alone), but Joan Cusack made it watchable.
I get this one and Newsies mixed up all the time. They both had Christian Bale in them, right?