Pop Rocks: Everybody Relax, Here Are Your 2013 Oscar Predictions

Categories: Pop Rocks

Best Documentary Feature
5 Broken Cameras
The Gatekeepers
How to Survive a Plague
The Invisible War
Searching for Sugar Man

I think everyone should see The Invisible War, especially if you have daughters who are thinking of enlisting, but the Academy likes feel-good endings, and Searching for Sugar Man has that (in addition to being a damn good film in its own right).

Winner: Searching for Sugar Man

Best Foreign Language Film
A Royal Affair
War Witch

Any other year, I'd like No, about the last days of the Pinochet regime, but this is really the only shot Amour -- a Best Picture nominee, recall -- has of winning anything.

Winner: Amour

Best Original Song
"Before My Time" - Chasing Ice
"Everybody Needs a Best Friend" - Ted
"Pi's Lullaby" - Life of Pi
"Skyfall" - Skyfall
"Suddenly" - Les Misérables

The only music anyone should remember from Ted is the Flash Gordon theme.

Winner: "Skyfall"

The rest of my picks are offered below with no commentary because Jesus is this a pain in the ass.

Best Animated Short: Paperman

Best Costume Design: Anna Karenina

Best Documentary Short: Open Heart

Best Film Editing Argo

Best Live Action Short Film: Curfew

Best Makeup and Hairstyling: The Hobbit: And Unexpected Journey

Best Original Score: Life of Pi

Best Production Design: Les Miserables

Best Sound Editing: Zero Dark Thirty

Best Sound Mixing: Les Miserables

Best Visual Effects: Life of Pi

Happy wagering. Remember: 15 percent. Chastain.

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