5 Worst Video Game Bosses...to Work for
Anybody can put together a list of video game bosses that are lame, and if we did we're pretty sure it would be 1,500 words and how incredibly messed up it is for Kirby to beat up on a tree. Not a Lord of the Rings walking tree that stomps orcs, but a regular tree that cries when you hit it. We don't care how badass you are, a crying tree asking you to stop hurting it is going to make you question the existence of a loving God.
No, we want to talk about the CEOs and Big Cheeses that inhabit video game worlds that we wouldn't work for even in this economy. So you may wake up tomorrow to head to your job as a fat sifter or cleaning the dingleberries from a poodle's derriere, but it beats the hell out of punching a clock for...
Specifically, we're talking the Joker from Arkham Asylum and the recently released Arkham City, though we're pretty sure that working for the Joker in any medium is pretty much a one-way ticket to Crapsville even if you are loyal and competent enough to deserve your own action figure.
There are two ways to play the Batman games. One is to do what most of us would do in real life, which is basically to run in helter skelter screaming, "I AM THE NIGHT" and getting your ass handed to you. The other is to use stealth and cunning. The double upside to this, besides not having several new anuses drilled into your stomach by bullets, is that you get to hear the henchfolk talk amongst themselves.
Let it go on long enough and you'll get a real idea of what working for the Joker is like. Our favorite was one guy mentioning that the Joker told him he would be fired if he didn't kill his sister. Also, he did spend a good deal of the first game randomly turning his team into giant hulking murder mutants, something the second game has pretty much pointed out leaves you very, very sick. Sure he's insane, but eventually you're going to run out of people dumb enough to work for you at this rate.