Low-Budget Brilliance: Some of Our Favorite Local Commercials

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While watching the morning news, Art Attack stumbled upon yet another wonderful local commercial, this time from Platinum Pools. It's hard to describe what made it so bizarrely amazing, we'll try and paint the picture:

Two bikini-clad beauties relax on a raft in their newly built Platinum Pool. A man comes over to them with a plate that contains one slice of pizza and hands it to bikini girl one. She takes the pizza and hands the empty plate to her friend, who looks at the empty plate like, "What? Where's my slice?"

Why did this guy think his bikini-babe would want a slice in the pool, especially when he didn't bring enough for the rest of class? Furthermore, who eats pizza in a pool?!

Local commercials, surely a monetary necessity for our neighborhood affiliate networks, can range from horribly ineffective to something that can only be described as pure genius. In recent years, local TV ads have embraced their low-def, meager budgets and moved to a more tongue-and-cheek route. However, there will always be the commercials that honestly take themselves seriously, forcing you to mock them.

Whether you find yourself singing the "Way to go Gillman..." Gillman Honda theme song or laughing at the DeMontrond duo dressed up for the rodeo, there's no denying that local ads are something to behold.

Here are a few of Art Attacks all time favorite local commercials.

Crazy Alan's Swamp Shack
Obviously these guys have a sense of humor, it's just a really weird one.

ABC Pest Pool and Lawn
This is a classic from ABC, Pest Pool and Lawn. It's awesome that their jingle has more or less stayed the same since 1971.

Gallery Furniture
Ahh, Mattress Mack! Thank you for giving us so many wonderful Gallery Furniture commercials to choose from. We picked this one for two reasons: one, Chuck Norris is in it, and two, when Mack asks Chuck something about the recliner, Chuck just laughs because he has no idea what Mack just said.

The Brown Hand Center
What does carpal tunnel have to do with "Daddy's baby girl?" We don't get it and now we are annoyed, and we still have carpal tunnel syndrome.

TexasLending.com
You have to agree, the Texas Lending guy needs an Oscar for his performance in this spot. It's one of the best commercials we've ever seen.

Houston Gold
"Private rooms?" "Professional settings?" And you walk out with cash in hand? Is this really a gold exchange company or a front for something more risqué than your mom's old brooch?

Space Center Houston
When we think about the Space Center, we too think about pirates and SpongeBob and high diving and McDonalds. Watch out! There's a pirate ship flying through the sky (No, seriously, there is).

We're sure you have your own gems to add to this list, we would love to hear them.

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6 comments
Kboyette
Kboyette

Gallery furniture really saves you money!! I had that jingle memorized by the time I was 5. Yes, folks, I spent that much time in front of the television. And I have to say, last year when I purchases my first very own new sofa I went to... you guessed it Gallery Furniture.

Rkoenig9
Rkoenig9

Bundling up in my snuggy sure takes the chill out of mortgage loans.

TTTWLAM
TTTWLAM

I've never been able to find it on the web, but the 1980s "Food Loop" commercial with all the rapping chefs ("Food Loop...Join the Food Loop...If you own a restaurant, you can be part of the troop") was comedy gold.

missXminnie
missXminnie

The Auto Insurance Discounter's lady creeps me out. I'd rather sit through "Mossy Nissan! Mossy Nissan MOVES YOU!" It's sad because the ad worked & I bought my car there. :(

Crystal
Crystal

You put the YEEHAW back in my motor and transmission.

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